Don't try to fit your couple in a schema, create your own by looking at how both of you function, and develop several couple facets (be funny, lovely, flirty, funny, parent, sexy, kind, etc.). Lack of sex drive is due to relationship issues most of the time. If you remove children from the equation, humans are serial monogamists. Chose someone that fulfills both your brain values and your physical instincts. Couple therapy is a success if both parties feel good after, whether together or not. Love at first sight releases so much dopamine it is like taking drug and affects the body. We don't like jealous people because we don't admire their constant need to be reassured. People who don't show negative emotions are likely to show no positive emotions as well, rocks don't shine. A partner may look like he is losing his temper while (s)he is actually coming out of a depression and becoming is true self. A couple is made out of love but lasts out of work, you won't always be in a loving phase but should work your agendas to have some regularly. The more you give importance to something, the more you will look into the details and try to interpret everything. An open mind is key to live an unusual life. You don't get to decide what is good for you and how you work. Most relationships have similarities but some are unique, be honest and don't judge yourself nor others. Routine is organization for organized couples but can feel daunting for others. A routine is bad if don't enjoy it. Having no routine is exhausting. Have a routine and break free from it regularly. If your partner is gone for a few days, how do you feel during that time and when you are close to meeting him/her again is a good indicator of if it is over or not. Follow your instinct more than your brain. 5 types of couple: passionate-conflicted (requires building something to last), melodrama (good parents but not having fun), reasonable (organized and solid but a bit boring), social (always with others but not always together), fusional (two is enough). Taking a break can work depending on the reason for it, the good one being to see how you feel alone without the other: do you miss him, do you need him, do you feel better? A break is useful if you analyze your feelings, not to escape and see other people. Context matters for infidelity, is the person feeling faulty and guilty but still wants to make things work? Ask the other in advance if he wants to know it if one day you cheat and define what infidelity means. Share your infidelity with your partner not to free your mind but to work the thing out and be ready for their answer. The keys to a healthy and durable relationship is that both parties have good intentions, they are kind and honest meaning bad-looking events weren't done to harm, that they handle dispute well, they know when their feelings go off track and apologies truly afterward, they talk about sex meaning they can talk about everything.
Gilbert Bou JaoudéOnly change for others if that makes you better. Nobody is toxic but many couples are misaligned. You want to have expenses rather than problems. You are more likely to win if both of you are winners. Fill the hole left by a breakup by working on yourself. Compromising your goals means compromising yourself. See family as one block to win together and be supportive. Be competitive against other people, not against each other. Don't stay with someone who makes you disrespect yourself. Do you fear not living up to your potential more than being alone? Internal conflicts and questioning is a reason worth of breaking up. Continuous career success is possible thanks to a healthy relationship. Spouse levels are sabotage, competitive, neutral, support, active help. Logical relationships last the longest despite possible harder beginnings. Be ok with being alone to date for growth rather than out of fear of loneliness. What you think don't matter maybe will, align your relationship with your goals. Who you are with outside of work matters more than who you are with at work. Does having this person in your life increase the likelihood of reaching your goals? Leaving a relationship with someone to get into one with yourself and your goal is a good thing. Care about you more than you care about the relationship, otherwise you will always feel alone. Look at your stats, do you workout more and eat healthier and work better and earn more when your spouse is around? You become like the people who you spend time with, pick a spouse you want to be like and take each other's best parts. Help your partner going through a though time at work by pushing him to go harder instead of distracting them with entertainment.
Leila Hormozi